LOVE LETTER OF FIANCEE- From My Next Novel SOMEONE SPECIAL
Completely thirty two days had gone, when I got a letter from postman, evening cloud had gone under the shadow of dark, artificial and giant light bulb of entire city was being burnt the blackness of environment.
And I tore packet of letter, in the age of internet and phone when I got a letter from a person, it was surprising nonsense, but I had to amazed, it was not a common letter, in sweet sugar it is love letter my psychologist fiancée has many idea to surprise me, this is it.
On the greenish and pink watermarked paper were lots of heart shaped design and many sketch of feelings made by Kangna, in the every corner, there were lips and somewhere was eye, yaa some smell of perfume too was locating and expanding. After cover and blank paper was something which make me always loveable.
I don’t know how to write a letter even it would be for your best person of life; still I try my best,
My……… Someone…… Special….. Pankaj…..
It is the day when I am felling a thunder of missing, reaction must be showed. You have been had by something stronger than my vigour.
When I saw you firstly, I could know, you have just had a childhood, my mind had been questioned, because I was seeing a painful withdraw on your skin pore, my mind started to ask me,
Where did it come from?
What you love about it?
What do you think of?
You did do it for whom? You must be lonely inside.
In the past life, these worms like emotions could have been your desire of love, what was your past is not necessary for me, but your present always needed me, I can guess it only.
I know for a better relationship we wants to be friend of each other, but you know only friendship is that relationship which have nothing to demand, then why we should start our journey of life with friendship only, cannot we become a lovely couple, I mean lover, it was hard step to write all these things to you, but I knew though you had agreed to marry with me, but you were missing something much, that was love of Naina, I know, I can’t be even a tiny part of Naina, but I will try my best, don’t know why I love your all those things which was existing in your life and now I want to make those things which can make exist our relationship till doomsday.
It is not in our ritual and tradition to meet to girl before the marriage but I want to meet you as a stranger girl, who will fall in love with you suddenly, I know you don’t like drama in life but for your sake and my happiness, you will have to do it.
And do not understand I am crazy, I have been prospected by all those things which either exist in love story novel or film. Think for a while if under the blue sky, a green scarf would blow and anklet rhythms make feelings to attract you, what a nice will be…
For a better impression I am trying to praise you, not so much as you are but little bit so that you could understand my madness, just a little bit.
It is better to be rush in flush of love.
For you, I have lived all these auroras with dimmed dark, with my lips sob and sober.
For you, I have lived all these night northern windless snuff of storm, with my unshed tears; I flee into whirlpool of your shy sight for losing everything of me in you.
But in my hearts the flames of love, have always been burning for you, only for you, volcanic eruption poured ash but this carbon of eye never pledged without your darkness of shadow.
Life has brought me a volume of old times, in which I search the page of us, word for us and epic for us.
And I am surrounded by countless memories, either memory makes me to remind you or I make my whole day and night a memory which can be my life.
Unasked I have now found all the answer I sought, even question for fate is not wondering that’s I have found you.
Look what I yearned for and what I got, it was tremendous boon perhaps my erotica of soul.
But in my heart the flames of love always say to you just come closer than my soul is in heart.
How can I describe the cruelty of this world, still I love this, it’s gifted you to me.
I was ordered that I have to live but without you, nobody can survive without sang-froid of hearts.
Unwise are those who say that to me you are unknown, untrue are all natural phenomenon which cause absence of you.
So many ordeals were heaped on me by this world; still I want to live in this world because you too are in this.
Come every day to me turn the night into a day, turn pale cheek into blush, on the sly under the sheet of night, blue grey sky under the roof of pal, where even the moon cannot approach, cloud cannot echoed, milky-way cannot cross my sash, let us go behind the black cloud, besides the heaven. Where every drops pine… every drop is in turmoil, every smooth touch of you, every taste of tongue is in snuggling. Where time stops still. Where ray jams even then sunshine becomes peevish to touch us. Give us a hug under the sheet of the night. Give us a kiss into warmth of body, in the warmth of winter’s sunshine, look at me with lowered eyes. Autumn’s all acquaint wish near of leaflet wish to remain in spring.
From behind, your hand blows hot and cold. Ever so softly in the raag Marva, as guitar wire cause tone for universal clank, which is celestial.
Let not the day set or the night fall, let not on the spring down or rains come, Let not the sun set, let not the half-moon shiver, And if it does, let not the morning break, let not the moonlit reaching out aback my chunni.
Let the night go on and on, let not the evening come and soon come, Lying to friends in somebody else’s name about you and me all through the night, you are away too long, your yonder are when wee of we met, turn to huge, for hug, but it wasn’t possible still I sat on your opposite side, so that wind from you could kiss my ringlet and nose. It is so difficult to just sign and be contented. It is so easy to remind you underneath my eyelid, mid of nose nook and on lip code.
When will the separation end?
Without you, this wind from the east seems silly it rushed into my scarf. Without you this hubbub of twinkling stars seems stupid runner, don’t ask about dream, it is drear until your footstep clutch it.
You also come and embrace me like this wind, someday.
You also go and return as day go and night come, someday night go still evening come, candle light dinner in early morning, because I would be in your lap under bed-sheet waiting for coffee but you will organize romantic dinner, to taste the lips in burning body as candle in candle-light dinner, music would be our breaths and sounds of silly-willy touch will song of romance.
If I can’t sleep tomorrow, call me to you. Keep my head and sing a lullaby. If I can’t woke up, necked me, feel my breath through your breath by joining of our nose, and just say- good morning even though that would be midnight or day still good morning.
LOVE YOU BUT I AM NOT YOUR LOVER, I CARE FOR YOU BUT I AM NOT YOUR FAMILY, I AM READY TO SHARE YOUR ENTIRE PAIN BUT I AM NOT IN YOUR BLOOD RELATION, I AM YOUR FRIEND, TRUE FRIEND, THE FIANCEE FRIEND, SCOLDS LIKE A DAD, CARE LIKE A MOM, TEASE LIKE SISTER, IRRITATE LIKE A FRIEND, FINALLY I LOVE YOU MORE THAN A LOVER…
How was that, really so bad, didn’t it?
The things which made me crazy about this letter was her attention about our relationship, I was smiling continuously, when you have reason to be happy rather should dance, I did.
Author--- DEVESH JHA..